The Early Morning Phone Call...

How many of you get triggered to write at 8 in the morning, as soon as u get up? Well, I'm writing exactly at that time, except that I haven't slept all night. Am I an Insomniac, a Workaholic, an Owl or just a freak... You'd have to know me for another 50 years to actually decide. So you're wondering what that trigger was? It was an early morning call from a dear friend of mine. It was a pretty interesting call actualy. Very much like 2 ordinary people speaking, except that neither one of us is ordinary.

So, it's just two non-ordinary people speaking about a lot of weird stuff... "sleep" to start off with...and "sleep" to move on with... So much "sleep" talk that I ended up putting this on FB - "Sleep is too over-rated". Of course my dear friend had my best interests at heart and she was just trying to make me realise that "ordinary" people sleep!! Sounded absurd coming from a non-ordinary person like her... :)

Anyways, as I said... Sleep IS over-rated and the talk did eventually shift to other crazier topics. This time the trigger was FB and one of its friend suggestions - "Vineet Nair". The discussion began on "Nair" and I ended up doing a search on Wikepedia, which informed me that the Nairs are a clan from Kerala and are also known as Malayala Kshatriya. That was when I remembered a search I had done last night, about "matriarchal society". Behind that is another long story and another phone call...(Yes, like my friends Neha & Ashish say... I am on my phone a lot). If you're wondering what matriarchal societies are, I'll tell u just enough to keep you interested... It refers to a form of society in which the leading role is taken by the women and especially by mothers of a community. Yes guys, I mean to say exactly what your thinking - Men take their wives' surnames after marriage, women/mothers own all the property, daughters GET all the property. Snap out of your nightmares (or beautiful dreams if you're a gal) coz Wikipedia says this - "There are no known societies that are unambiguously matriarchal." I'm hopeful even though my other friend (the one I was speaking to last night) said that 25 years from now, when I have kids, India might just be a matriarchy. I'm not any prophet, but I find that close to impossible.

All this discussion on Wikipedia facts ended up in my dear friend saying that now she knew what I did all night... Girls are sooooo naive... Sorry was that too cheezy? :)

Anyways, i moved on to more interesting grounds after that... I thought of reading out lyrics of two beautiful songs I had heard a few days back. The words made so much sense... especially me reading them to her. I don't think she realised that either... :)

We spoke about quite a few other things as well...

a) A cheque of mine which I "supposedly" did not tell this friend about (at least not b4 she found out from someone else) and now that cheque is lost in the stationary of SBI probably and never got cashed into my account. I told her - "tumhari nazar lag gai" and asked her not to repeat the same to another cheque coming in 2 days...She replied - "I'll transfer your lost money from my account to yours if you want".. now, if you're thinking..What a gr8 friend... I'll just tell you that she was JOKING and she's a pakka baniya (is the gender right for a gal... dunno).

b) A Teaching Associate at IIM Indore who apparently has a lot of student friends on FB, including my dear friend.

c) A blog - "Wake up and Smell the Coffee" which I was recommending her to read.... This was I believe the time when she commented - "I guess this is the prelude to an author's life" in a very sarcastic but friendly way. I joked back - "Why don't u just say Madness before becoming an Author". She kinda didn't like that joke. She doesn't like a LOT of things about me (my humour being just one of those things which are pretty high up on the list). I got a good verbal bashing for that.... And that was just the start.

Over the course of our 27 minute talk... she got the impression (more than once) that I was asking her to hang up or sleep (never realising that she HERSELF did mention numerous times that she loved sleeping and could take another nap). Anyways, she eventually slammed the phone on me (I don't know if that line works these days, considering that we all use cell phones, but anyways, I'm sure u get the point). I know... How rude of her!! She didn't call back either. Yes... I did, and gave her a nice sentimental line - "You won't always find people who'll call you back" and then I hung up (what did u think I'd do...??). This time she did call back... but it all went down-hill from there.. I could feel the tension between us on the line. It ended with a lot of silence... another one of my crazy jokes and a pretty rough "good bye". No one called after that...

But technology did some more damage. I'm referring to the devil abbreviated as "SMS". She texted a few things... and I wrote back nastier stuff (her fault... she put them in my mouth, or should I say fingers..). That was the end of the beautiful morning... From Great to Nice to Bad to Horrible. Am I saying Sorry to her...?? I'd love to, but I know her too well. She wouldn't care. After a couple of days, she'll just behave as if nothing happened... Suits her. Doesn't suit me but I guess we all live in a matriarchal society in some ways... :)

This post is dedicated to my "Dear Friend"... Friends Forever....

The Truth Behind each Mask

In a way, this post is a review of "Adam", the Hugh Dancy-Rose Byrne starring movie released in 2009, however it's a bit more about human behaviour. No I'm not going to get into psychology or philosophy, and you might be intrigued by my views.

First... A brief background about "Adam"... the movie is about Adam, who suffers from Asperger Syndrome, which in turn is the reason for his odd behaviour when it comes to interacting with the society at large. The movie is a sweet romantic comedy with elements of drama included to give seriousness to the characters. Adam seems to survive on - meals consisting of All-Bran Cereal and Macaroni & Cheese and his love for electronics & astronomy (to be honest he's a know-all nerd). His life turns up-side down when he meets Beth who has just moved into the same apartment as him. Beth pulls Adam out of his sheltered life into the true world. The relationship they share is amazing (to say the least), and shows you an extreme case of love between two very different individuals. Anyways, I'll let you watch the movie to enjoy the feel truly.

What i'm interested in bringing out is the innocent honesty of Adam, which of course leads him to people's weird looks on most occasions. Asparger Syndrome (AS) might be called a neurobiological disorder but what's true, is that in many ways it keeps you a child... a child true to himself and true to everyone else. Why is it a disorder? Because we're used to social norms and lies and anyone who doesn't fit into our society is weird? Well, it led me to wonder... aren't we all the one's who have been ruined by age and social up-bringing? Aren't we the ones who wear masks day in and day out? Aren't we the ones who lie to our family, our friends or anyone else for that matter?

Day in and day out, we are expected to understand what other people are thinking. But we aren't ready to just express ourselves without having to lie. We just pretend to understand the world... we're expected to know what our loved ones are feeling, but is it that easy? And are our predictions always correct (ask a boy and girl in a relationship, you'll know what I mean)? We love to hide our true self because we're scared of what people would think about us. Wouldn't it be nice if for once the whole world wore no mask? Wouldn't you like to be honest to every person you interacted with? I think I would... I'd love to discard my mask and be able to speak my heart and mind out, without the fear of "what they would think". The world would be a better place if all of us had an element of AS in us. Initially it might sound difficult, it might sound uncivilized. but in the end, it would be beautiful.... Then again... that's my view. :)

Just one more thing... Do check out these two soundtracks from "Adam" (they're lovely):

"Someone else's life" by Joshua Radin

"When you find Me" by Joshua Radin feat. Maria Taylor

This post is dedicated to all those with Asperger Syndrome

The Author Within...

It's been a habit for me... When I'm supposed to be the busiest in my life, I suddenly seem to find some time to write on my blog. I guess it helps me keep my cool. Yes, i love writing. Today, I finally started to write a novel. ok, now don't give me that look... It's been a dream to write stories, and I lost the touch after the first short story I wrote when I was in Read School, Connecticut (5th Grade). It's become such a distant memory now.

At times I feel that I would've ended up a writer if I stayed in the U.S. But, once back in India, I just ended up following that race of ambitions.. fulfilling the family's dreams... From a Writer to a Doctor to an Engineer to a Manager and Entrepreneur... The first two I never actually became... the third is for namesake... and the last two, well, I guess I'm finally passionate about them.. Education tends to do this to you... You don't need "3 idiots" to learn that... And parents won't change even after they see such movies. :) No, I'm not criticizing the movie! Far from it... I'm a hard core fan of Aamir and loved the movie.

Excuse me for this mindset... It's Placement Season and well... You're mind starts to think this is all trivial. Yeah... Money, fame, recognition.... Who needs all that, right?? Yeah right... Who are you kidding? Unless, you're in your early 60s like my dad, don't even think you're gonna fool anyone. Yeah, we all wana make a difference, but I havent' seen too many people who would do it at the cost of their own careers. Now, you're probably branding me as "Typical IIM Grad". Stop being judgemental, and just read....

Everyone has dreams, right?? You ask kids... They want to be a Painter, a Dancer, a Singer, a Filmstar, a Sportstar... The things he/she finds more glamorous, come higher up the list... I wanted to be a writer.. I was fascinated by the way we could make the world look/behave through our imagination. I loved movies (especially animations like Lion King, Aladdin etc) and wished I could cook up some story like that some day. It was then that a teacher encouraged me to write for the school magazine... and I did. What happened after that... Well, Daddy dearest decided to move back to India and the rest is history... (No, I'm not complaining about having come back here. I'm not a hard core patriot, but I do love India, in many ways... and more than anything else, this place has given me gr8 friends). But yes, after coming back here, it was all about proving your worth to the family. Writing was not a career. Not that I myself ever took it seriously. As I grew up, materialism began to set in. Money became the ever-existing vice. it became "god" at some age. And then, that was history...

What state of my life am I now in....?? The stage where I say to myself... I'll do work that'll make me happy, but not at a very low pay. Money doesn't rule the mind, but "work" does. In management parlons, it's the profile, the JD that matters. But "packages" are always at the side of the mind, in addition to brand names... So we become choosy. We think we deserve better. Never really knowing, when "better" arrives. and so, today, I sat down and began to think... What do I really want. And you know what I came up with...??

I saw myself travelling... Travelling to crazy unknown places... Why? To write... a novel. Meeting people, interacting (through sign language on many occasions) and putting thoughts into words. Not worrying about next week's paycheck, but writing coz I love it. Not to win any Nobel or Booker or Pulitzer... But because I love it!!

Ok, this was not any revelation and I have not decided to become a travelling gypsy, so don't jump to conclusions. :) But I did decide today to start writing... bit by bit... and come up with a short novel. Please don't ask me "when" or "about what". Let the author inside me decide. Maybe I'm just trying to hold on to the ashes of a dead dream. But then again, I'd like to try...