The Bangalore Trip

Have u ever been really misunderstood? Of course you have. We all have been through it. A blog post I wrote in Jan turned out to be too controversial for my taste. Fought with two very important people over it. And then I disappeared into a cocoon, a bit scared of hurting more feelings. But I came back, after a few smiles over the same post - my hands itching to write. And here I am writing again....

Regarding the last few months... LOTS has happened!! I've become an Alumni. I've been hired. I've fought over one of my life's biggest decisions. I've met some old friends after a very very long time. and the vacation still aint over. Some of you who follow me on Facebook, might know what I'm bragging about but for the rest...

• I've graduated from IIM Indore with a Post Graduate Diploma in Management
• I shall be joining Pfizer on June 28th
• Let's skip this one for the time being
• I traveled to Bangalore and met friends from my days in Kota and Chennai

Yes, I'm still in bullet-point mode. :)
Points 1 and 2 - Not for today, and not for this blog. Point 3 would require a whole new blog or a book.
The Bangalore trip.... that's when the mind starts flowing with words.

They call Bangalore (or should I say Bangaluru) the Silicon Valley of India. Naturally, it's the city where many of my best friends are employed today. In addition to that, a cousin sister and her two great kids... The city becomes an emotional magnet, to which I surrendered this summer. The trip being pretty much unplanned saw me traveling by buses almost everywhere. I hate Railways for allowing people to plan their trips 3 months in advance and then cancel 24 hrs b4 departure, losing just 20 bucks. Madness!!

What was so amazing about the Bangalore Trip? Friends & Family (I'm sure that sounds strange after my previous post, but then again I did say I'm a big sucker for family and even bigger when it comes to friends)... We have strange relations with many members of the family, but with some we just have an understanding, a bonding.. though we meet very little, we feel we can just open up to them. That's how it is with my cousin in Bangalore... even though we're 12 yrs apart by age. and her daughter, well she's a true doll - one gal whom it's so hard to say goodbye to. Some people could really get parenting skills from that pair (I mean my Sis and Jiju). :) It became tough when I had to divide the limited time between her family and my friends out there. But, I'd say I managed pretty well, even though time management isn't my forte.

When we say goodbyes we always think we'll meet people some time soon. Even me.... but that's not how it worked out with my roommate from Kota (Anurag); we met after 6 years, and boy was that a long time for buddies like us. GE had to send that fool off to Bulgaria or Hungary or Bosnia or some country like that.... and hence I was only able to spend about half a day with him, half of which I spent twitching with food poisoning (not what you expect after eating at a place like Sahib Sindh Sultan - awesome decor I must say however). Whatever the pain may have been, the shared nostalgia was amazing!! It felt like we were 18 again, playing cricket, tackling neighbors, sharing meals in Kota again.

There was a touch of Chennai and Indore as well in Bangalore. The former I met after 2 years and the latter... well after 2 months, but both felt like ages. An evening which took us from Shoppers Stop to Hard Rock Cafe to UB City to some restaurant whose name I can't recall (strange considering that I gave my treat there)... followed by a night which some would wish to remember and some.... well..... u know what I mean. ;-) Let's just say we were in high spirits, some more than others. What will I never forget from that day.... Chandu's bag of gold, Raj's constant whining as he sat behind me on his Pulsar :), Gokul's advice and also his description of how TCS mates work, Rudra & Sidhu driving all the way from Chennai, the argument with Swati over the route to her guesthouse, Rijin's photography stints, Raj's community mug, Sachin's persistent efforts to get back home b4 his mom wakes up and well.... my dance (read "hands and legs moving in unknown directions in no particular fashion") and mimickery (no, not of politicians or film stars, but of a German Shepherd and a Pomeranian).

Though I was gone from home for almost a month (including the time spent in Surat & Mumbai), I hardly felt the time pass (unlike my time spent in Udaipur). I just hope Bangalore beckons me again very soon.

Dear Family

A 1000 nails being hammered into my head. That's how it feels right now. Nothing extraordinary - just a severe headache in full force (A result of physical and mental exertion). The former due to a bit of early morning traveling and some very hot weather and the latter due to a Pandora's Box full of reasons. I too hope that, similar to mythological beliefs, once all the pains of this box are released, "hope" is left inside.

You must be wondering what fills my Pandora's Box.... Well, to keep it simple, "Family & Relationships". I know there's loads of hype in this world about family being the first home and how loving and caring family members are... bla bla bla. Fine, all that is great. I agree, it has its benefits. But the heavy burden and pain and tears it also brings along is probably ignored by many. Or maybe some people are just born into perfect families, though I highly doubt that. I truly feel that all blood relations are pretty screwed up. I'm sure it'll be scientifically proved some day that similar gene structures repel each other (A new and evolved Bio-magnetism Theory).

April-June 2010 has been the longest time period I've spent at home since 2002, and I must say, i haven't enjoyed it one bit. I'm honestly sick of all the back-biting and fake love & care shown for each other. I hate that many of us just cant be honest and tell each other how much we hate each others guts. It's frustrating to see how much people compromise and struggle to keep a good face in the family. I find it highly baffling - the capacity which people possess to speak and bother about everything beneath the sky, other than themselves. 

They say "Honesty is the best policy" and "Lying is a bad deed", but then they teach their children lies from Day 1. We call half those lies "Good Manners". The remaining half is eulogized by us Indians as OUR great culture. "Beta, Sabhi ko Pranam bolna" ; "Uncle-Aunty, Bahut achha laga aap padhaare" . The minute they're out the gate, you bitch about them. What the hell??

We worship many relations in India. Father, Mother, Sister, Brother, Husband etc. Yeah, we had our own ways of celebrating them, far before Archies and 123greetings created so-called " ----- Days". How many of us actually love "all the above". If you said Yes, I have a few words for you... "Good, but quit lying to yourself". I'm not saying all family-relationships suck, but yes most DO. We curse the Americans for their rotten culture. Why? Because they're frank? Because they don't tolerate bull shit? Because they say goodbye to relationships which lost their meaning at the age of 15. or sometimes at the age of 4.... or is it because they're over-professional when it comes to family?

I have very rarely seen 2 brothers live "happily ever after", it's not just the Ambani Bros.  We just don't shoot each other (well at least most of the time). Half the marriages in our culture are compromises, but we're greater than the western society coz we stick together like glue and pretend to be hunky dory. Half the kids in our country also hate their old parents. But we have the best culture in this world because we don't send them to old-age homes. I wonder how many of you have witnessed family quarrels... or seen family-wealth division. How much more professional can we get man....

I'm probably one of the biggest family-loving suckers in this world, but I won't lie, not to myself, not to anyone else, maintaining many of these blood-based or should I say gene-based relationships, gives me nightmares and at times a real heart-ache. I once told one of my siblings... "I wish I could keep everyone happy". But I ask myself now... Who am I kidding. It's impossible. We just LOVE to HATE....

P.S. To all those who have the same A-T-G-C structure as me, please don't call me to give me Gyaan. I love you all.... :)